hmph

I wonder if anything will ever change.

Sunday

No Hawks this Sunday, so go Packers. College ball is over, so I guess that Sunday is back to being my favorite day of the week, for a few more weeks. I wish that there was a little more on the menu for today, but rest is probably a good thing.

Love is like a game

And not the game that you're thinking. I think that it's kind of like a sports game. It's fun, exhilarating, and sometimes the opposition can do things that make you crazy and leave you scrambling to find your bearings. You sometimes win, and sometimes you lose, but, regardless, at the end, you always feel better having experienced it than having not. As few as a couple weeks ago I was on cloud nine, super excited about having met someone new, and now, not knowing if that's going anywhere or even if I'll talk to the girl again, I'm not mad, and I don't feel like I wasted my time. I have had three of the most fun dates of my life with this girl, and meeting her has helped me to overcome some of the toughest trials that I've had in my life so far, and honestly, dating her, even if it turns out to have only been for two and a half weeks, did more for me than the last two years.

So, to her, I say thank you, for saying yes, and for sharing what you shared with me. I know you're not going to read this, but I feel like I was a little too excited, but you were worth being that excited over. I wish you nothing but the best. It's really nice to meet people who end up showing you what you can be if you try hard enough. I owed it to myself to try to be as good as you were. I hope that you never lose your drive and that you never settle for anything less than you deserve. I hope we stay in touch, but God's will and all that.

So, I have no regrets, this is going to be a great year. Looking forward, my heart is full.

new idea

I think too much, I think it's painfully obvious when the subject of my thinking too much told me not to think so much. I end up second guessing myself and my reactions are calculated, rather than natural. That's never a good thing. So, here's a pledge to be more natural and not so methodical to the point of detriment.

overthinking

perhaps i spoke too soon, but I need to turn my brain off. it's my greatest enemy, after all. we shall see.

Missing

You ever just wake up and miss someone because you dreamed about hanging out with them that night? I hate dreams, because they aren't really controllable, and they reflect some of your innermost desires. So, I think I'm okay in saying that it stinks when you dream of holding someone in your arms only to wake up, groggy and confused, to being alone. It's interesting to me, I can't believe how quickly that someone can come into your heart in an unguarded moment. IF you don't keep it shut at all times, then someone that you're least expecting can just walk into your heart and walk out with it. And half the time, you don't even know that it's happened. All you know is that for some reason, you don't have a problem doing things for that person, and that you always want to spend time with them. When you're not with them, it's like colors just aren't as bright, and the food just doesn't taste quite so good. Which is a silly old cliche, but I think that there is a reason that certain statements become cliche, and that is their ubiquitous application. I mean, you always roll your eyes at cliche statements, but if you really think about it, there is a pretty big chance that said statement would apply to your life at one point or another. That's a scary thought, that maybe we're living a comedy of cliches in our lives. So, in respect to those of you who sneer at cliches, I will leave you with my favorite line from Remember the Titans, "When something unexpected comes to you, you just have to pick it up and run with it." And maybe, this time, I'm running to the end zone.

Deuces

So, I think I'm finally ready to chuck the deuces to the memory of failed expectations and broken hearts and move on. I think I'm finally ready to just go naturally and see where life takes me. If it takes me to a person that I can share my life with, then I'll let it.

So that's my thought for today. That and that I'm happy that the Hawks are the first 7-9 division champion in league history. That's pretty good. If we win Saturday, coupled with a successful trip to the batting cages and five guys burgers and fries, I think I'll be a happy camper. Here's to keeping my fingers crossed and to going into something wide eyed with no expectations.

Knocked Down

You always have to maintain an open mind. Sometimes what you're looking for is gonna be right there in front of your face. Maybe not the right time, but don't ever close off any possibilities, maybe you'll meet someone that you could really care for.